Monday, January 27, 2014


Today we remember a life we once knew four years ago, celebrating Josiah's birthday and home-going.

For the unaware - we found out about a week prior to Josiah being born that he would not live after birth. I was seven months pregnant when our 8+ pound third child entered this world, heart still beating, unable to take a breath on his own. We said hello and goodbye within minutes.

Having to give a child back to Jesus has been the most difficult thing I've ever done - hands down. Labor/delivery with the others (yes, even the eleven-pounder), the c-section with Josiah...those were walks in the park compared to letting him go. It's amazing how physical pain can fade, but emotions linger, cropping up from time to time, making for good days and bad days.

We already see God's hand in how this day is being redeemed. Our Josiah shares his birthday with two other close friends' children, and neither one of those friends had due dates very close to today. God knew what he was doing, and that hasn't changed. Just as David did when his child died (yup, it's true...check out 2 Samuel 12), we, too, trust that we will be with Josiah again someday.

For now, we are thankful for those who walked (and continue to walk) this road so closely with us. We are thankful for these three healthy, earthly blessings.

And we remember, continuing on with the new "normal" that we know.

Happy four years in Heaven, little man.

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

A New Year

Happy New Year!

Yes, a couple of weeks late. With three kiddos (two of whom have the typical winter colds), a dog, frozen winter pipes, a husband, and a job, that's pretty much the "lateness" that I average.

So, how about a little catch up?

Thanksgiving and Christmas were much-needed breaks, spent with family and friends and the busyness that the holiday season has to offer. We intentionally slowed down some, but definitely not enough. We're working on that!

My youngest baby will be turning one in less than a month. My oh my, how quickly the past 11 months went by! I'm sure many others can attest to that as well. The older I get, the faster life comes and goes. I'm working so hard at enjoying every moment (even while pulling the night shift with a crying, stuffy, teething, coughing baby). It doesn't stay this way very long!

This year holds so much change and adjustment, and we're taking it one day at a time. When I think about the dates coming up (my baby walking soon, the four-year anniversary of Josiah's birth/death, my second starting kindergarten, pending work trips, turning 26 31 35, races we are registered for, training to get in, parties to plan, etc., etc., etc.), it can all get so overwhelming. My goal is to enjoy everything and handle the hard things IN.THE.MOMENT. If I stress, it will pass me by quicker than I can blink, and I will gain nothing.

Remind me (and yourself) of that when you see me. We both probably need it. :)

Happy 2014!